Re: You Nigerian Muslim men are awks

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In the name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.

“Invite (all) to the Way of your Rabb (Cherisher and Sustainer) with wisdom and beautiful preaching; and argue with them in ways that are best and most gracious: for your Rabb knows best, who have strayed from His Path, and who receive guidance.” (16:125)

I had the pleasure of reading the written pains of a sister on https://wanderinglass.com/2016/05/02/you-nigerian-muslim-men-are-awks at the beginning of the week. I had planned to write something in defence of our sisters, but extending the above subject matter was too good an opportunity to miss in shaa Allah. So I had to keep that work in progress defence of mine in a safe deposit.

“Kind words and forgiving of faults are better than charity followed by injury. And Allah is Rich (Free of all wants) and He is most Forbearing.”   (2:263)

“Allah does not love the utterance of evil words in public except by one who has been wronged. Allah is He Who hears and knows all things.”   (4:148)

After reading the content of the above topic on the sister’s blog, I came to the conclusion that we (Muslims) are the enemies of ourselves. Anyone still wonder why Pope Francis will take refugees from Syria to Rome to give them a ray of hope, whilst the affluent Muslim countries fold their arms to the continued refugee crisis.

I am not going to be supporting either side in my piece as I am of the opinion that now is the time to be of assistance to one another as we climb the ladder of being better in the Deen. We all are not perfect, hence there is the need for us to focus on assisting one another at getting better. We should be racing one another towards the Akhirah instead of focusing on how to make another person feel worthless.

Whilst it is praise worthy that we correct others, it is also important that we correct them with love and consideration for their feelings. If you can’t correct with the fear of Allah, then it makes sense to tow the weakest of faith line, which is to correct with the heart. When we see other Muslims engaging in activities that are wrong, what is required of us is to correct them by pulling them aside and advising them in a beautiful way. A slave of Allah will be conscious of his remarks and will ensure that his utterances don’t hurt others. We need to be kind to ourselves in our actions and words.

Most scholars that I know, at the start of their sermons, first admonish themselves before they admonish others. We should walk together in the Deen and assist one another in growth by ensuring that our actions do not leave chaos behind us.

Whilst being a Muslim is a difficult choice to make today, being a Muslimah is a far more difficult choice. Look at our corporate environment and see how our sisters that use the hijab stick out of the multitude of ladies that work in such environments. To Allah, it is difficult. If our sisters bear this test with grace, we the brothers should learn to salute them and urge them on. Our approach shouldn’t be to curse them out because we feel their hijab is not long enough. These sisters are the heroes of Islam today and we should accord them that recognition.

Each and everyone of us is a student of the Deen and we seek Allah’s mercies in making us better Muslims. If Allah enjoins us to call the unbelievers to Islam with wisdom, then we should admonish our brothers and sisters with compassion and love for the sake of Allah. We shouldn’t chase ourselves away from the Deen by using harsh words and cursing one another.

Abdullah ibn Mas’ud reported: The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “No one who has the weight of a seed of arrogance in his heart will enter Paradise.” Someone said, “But a man loves to have beautiful clothes and shoes.” The Prophet said, “Verily, Allah is beautiful and He loves beauty. Arrogance means rejecting the truth and looking down on people.”

We should learn to be humble with our knowledge and know that every individual needs improvement as the “call” for improvement shouldn’t be directed towards a particular set of people because of their gender. During the life of the Prophet (SAW), whist we had Abubakar, we also had Umm Salamah, Hind Al-Makhzoomiyyah, who was a Sahaabiyaat of the Prophet (SAW).

In conclusion, I implore everyone of us to close ranks with the sole aim of assisting one another. We should provide our admonitions with the fear of Allah and we should not let our actions turn others into stray lambs that could be devoured by the lions.

‘Abdullah Bin ‘Amir (R.A.) narrated that the Prophet (SAW) never used bad language. He used to say, “The best amongst you are those who have the best manners and character.”

(Bukhari 4/759 and 8/56)

 

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